Have you ever thought about the power of stillness?
To feel a pulse
To hear from God
To listen to our own bodies and desires
Sometimes I think that we have this idea that sex is all about movement – in and out, back and forth, frantic motion – trying to make something happen. So much motion that we get lost and dizzy and miss out on what is there all along.
When I think about stillness, I think about lying on top of my husband, face to face, hearing his breath, feeling the pulse where our bodies meet, and hearing the bu bum – bu bum of his heart beating. In this stillness, we find each other and then we go somewhere together.
Don’t get me wrong – there are times for movement – lots of movement. But there are also times for stillness. In fact, movement means so much more when it is contrasted to stillness. Stillness sling shots us into places that we could not go otherwise by making us wait – we settle, we feel, we awaken, we yearn, we ache – all the while pulling the elastic of the sling shot further and further back until we cannot stand it anymore.
Stillness during sex might be —
Climbing on top of your husband, sitting completely still, focusing on feeling him inside of your body and waiting for pleasure spots to awaken. Hearts beat together, eyes lock, and the vagina begins to grasp, hold and press against him.
Taking your husband to the edge – and then holding him there. The mouth encompasses him in stillness as the tongue firmly presses into the sweetest of spots – his frenulum. He urges for more and thru stillness you are able to sense his rolling over the peak even before he does.
Fingers sensitively intertwined in your wife’s inner lips and clitoris. Lubrication acts as a conduit to meld two bodies together so that no pulse, no sensation is missed. Play that happens in other areas – the breasts, the lips – thru stillness is felt with fingers as the clitoris becomes aroused.
A wet tongue firmly pressed against her sweetest spot, intently feeling her and urging her to awaken. Movement counterbalances stillness when she longs for more and then pauses once again. As her body awakens and begins to move against a still tongue, you feel and wait patiently for your turn to show her what you have learned.
Stillness is a powerful way to experience each other and for most of us it does not come naturally. It is something that comes with maturity as we relax, stop trying so hard and just enjoy. When I think about some of the most profound encounters with God, it has been when I have been still. Dare to try something different during sex and…
Just Be Still
Psalm 23:2-3 He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.