Five years ago, I’m not sure I imagined that I would still be teaching Awaken-Love and that it would have impacted over 700 women. Serving God through Awaken-Love has been an honor and privilege. I cannot imagine doing anything else. If you want to read more about how I got here then read Remember, and 4 Year Anniversary
Every time I start a class, women anxiously sit down wondering what “sex class” is going to be like. I immediately make two things very clear…
- Though their husband may benefit from them taking the class, Awaken-Love is for them.
- Nothing I say is going to change them. If they want real transformation, it comes from God.
Recently a woman shared that after the first night, she almost emailed saying, “this class wasn’t for her”, but she decided to stick it out. She had been a virgin bride that followed all the rules. But deep down felt sex was dirty and for her husband. On her wedding night, sex was less than magical. She
sarcastically thought to herself, “So I get a lifetime of this?” She and her husband gradually had less and less sex as resentment built and conflict grew. After a few weeks of class, she opened up about what God was teaching her and her plans to talk with her husband, “I have some repenting to do. I want to start working on our sex life to make it what God wants for us.” At the end of 6-weeks she said, “Not only are we having more sex and better sex, but it has impacted other areas of our life. We are doing all kinds of things together.”
Another woman showed up to class with a quizzical look of knowledge and yet somehow hiding. As her story unfolded it became clear that she had no problem enjoying sex physically but wrestled with shame. When she married her husband, she knew of his struggle with porn, but the real secret was her struggle with erotica. Once it was out in the open they agreed to hold each other accountable battling what Satan had twisted. I think deep down, they both probably felt somehow broken because of the struggles they battled. During class, she gradually began to realize that God did not make a mistake – she was created to enjoy words and her husband was created to enjoy his eyes – in marriage. He could feast his eyes on her during sex and together they could spin stories with words to create magic in their marriage bed. What the world had twisted, God designed to strengthen their marriage.
The last 6 months, I have buried myself in teaching because it is where I feel most comfortable and where my path is clearest. Teaching has restored me, renewed my faith in God, and allowed me to avoid wondering “what next?”
People sometimes ask, “How’s ministry going?” I am not exactly sure how to answer. I am currently teaching four different classes at 3 different churches, that are filled with women from all over the twin cities. I see God move all the time and many women affirm how impactful and important class is… yet I feel sad – because I can only teach so many classes.
Since January, we have had 9 women step up to facilitate the video class for friends. One of the video groups was a leadership team from MOPS. The class not only strengthened their marriages but has taken their friendship to a whole new level. I am excited as I hear the stories of conversations, healing and transformations that are taking place using the Video Classes. Women are inviting friends and lives are being changed.
As I celebrate my 5-year anniversary, I have been asking the question,
“If I could do anything, what would it be?”
Speaking to Groups
I have fallen in love with speaking to newlyweds, women, or couples and am looking for more opportunities. Recently a woman signed up for Awaken-Love because she heard me speak at a marriage class. She said, “I had never heard someone speak about sex like you did and it gave me hope that maybe something could change.” When I speak, I will challenge you to push beyond the same old messages we’ve heard about sex and explore what God really intends.
Speaking to Leaders
The past 5 years of teaching Awaken-Love, I have learned so much about the struggles that Christian marriages face in their sex life. I am praying for opportunities to share what I know with church leaders to fill them with compassion, understanding and vision. Our world is quickly changing and marriages need resources to help with the challenges of sexuality.
Two years ago, 150 women showed up at Melanie’s church to hear me speak on sex and many followed up by taking Awaken-Love. I would love to travel to churches to help launch Awaken-Love by creating interest, and spending time equipping teachers or facilitators. Awaken-Love easily fits into a 2 hour women’s bible study format at church. Women are looking for answers. Are churches willing to step up?
Have you discovered what a gift sex is to your marriage? Do you realize how many women struggle? Is God tugging on your heart to make a difference in your corner of the world, but you don’t know how?
One of my greatest joys has been equipping teachers of Awaken-Love and seeing how God works. If you feel called to really invest in women, I would be thrilled to talk to you, so please contact me.
As I prayed in the New Year, I heard God say very clearly, “Stay the Course”, and so that is what I will do. I will keep teaching, thanking God for the doors He opens, walking through them and trusting God with the rest.