We can learn to talk about sex in good and healthy ways to equip and encourage others
One of the lies that profoundly impacts Christians about sex is that we cannot talk about it. We have grown up with sex clothed in silence while the world screams lies at the top of their lungs. The more I understand about women’s struggles, pornography and the culture our kids are navigating, the more I understand the importance of learning to talk about sex.
Women that take the Awaken-Love class make huge strides in their healing because they open up and talk. They hear other women in the room share their struggles and relate to their stories. Respectful conversations about the mechanics of sex equip women to communicate needs to their husband. Understanding the importance of sharing about connection thru sex helps them to talk with their kids. As women support and cheer each other on growth happens. Class shows women they can talk about sex in respectful ways to encourage others.
The first step in battling pornography is to bring it to the light. Creating a safe environment where husband and wife talk about sex might be the first building blocks of being fully known. Communities of churches where people are open about their struggles are communities where people find healing. We need to stop pretending like everything is great, be real, and start talking.
In the book Girls and Sex, I was struck by how highly educated, bright girls didn’t seem to have the language to say “no” to certain sex acts. Our kids are not equipped to talk about sex, because we don’t talk to them. It is time to blow the doors off of communication about sex with our kids. It is a lie that if you talk to your kids about sex, they will have sex. They are having sex because we haven’t talked to them. Conversations have to be judgement free zones that equip our kids to make good choices. We have to communicate about all facets of sexuality because if we don’t, they will easily find an answer from the world. Welcome every opportunity to talk to your kids about sex.
Can you imagine what a difference it would make if people in the church started talking about sex? What if we had accountability partners in marriage? “Been on a date lately?” “Have you taken time to connect lately?” “Are the two of figuring things out?” Let’s blow the doors open and start talking.