I have decided it is time to get serious about doing Kegel exercises. After reading about a study that showed a direct correlation between Kegel strength and orgasm during intercourse for women, I am ready to stop messing around and start focusing. Especially as I age, I want to do all that I can to experience the pleasure God has for me.
For several years my husband has been faithfully doing his Kegel’s and the results have been amazing. His flow during urination has improved and he longer has to urinate in the middle of the night. Awareness and control of the Kegel muscles has helped him to relax and enjoy sex more. He no longer worries about lasting long enough and he even enjoys multiple orgasms. Pleasure during sex has changed to include a range of experiences. My husband takes his Kegel exercises seriously.
I notice him in the shower or while he’s brushing his teeth. The other day I asked him how many he does and he said, “100 while I wake up, 100 while brushing my teeth, 600 driving to work, 600 driving home, 100 in the shower, and 100 while brushing my teeth before bed”. To tell you the truth, my jaw just kind of dropped. I had no idea how many. But Kegel exercises do not take any extra time from his day. He’s seen what Kegel’s have done for his urinary tract health and for his sex life and now I want to see what they can do for mine.
Recently I read The G-Spot by Ladas, Whipple and Perry and it enlightened me to the sexuality studies from the late 70’s validating the range of experiences women enjoy. A major section of the book focuses on the importance of Kegel muscles, not only to women’s health and urinary control but to their sexual response.
In 1979 Benjamin Graber and Georgia Kline, a couple of sex therapists, collected data from 281 patients. They sorted them into three groups – those that could not orgasm, those that could orgasm only during clitoral stimulation, and those that could orgasm during intercourse or clitoral stimulation. Measuring the strength of the women’s Kegel muscles using a perineometer confirmed what the therapists already suspected. Women who did not experience orgasm had the weakest muscles with an average reading of 7. While those that experienced orgasm during intercourse had the strongest muscles with an average of 17. The women that could experience clitoral orgasm landed in the middle with an average reading of 12. If I want the greatest chance of enjoying the full range of sexual experiences, then I need to have strong Kegel muscles.
In our immediate gratification society, many of us have a hard time waiting. We would rather take a pill or get an operation than commit to physical therapy for weeks or even months. We want to see immediate results or we begin to doubt the plan will work and eventually give up.
Strengthening my Kegel muscles will take time and consistency. I don’t have the reminder of a pulled muscle that needs rehabilitation, or the cost of medical bills to motivate me. Improvement may feel negligible and I might not notice changes for months. Unless I have a plan and commit, chances are slim Kegel exercises will become a regular part of my day. My exercise time will be in the shower, while I brush my teeth, at the microwave and in the car. At least 3 times a day, 100 reps to start out, and increasing weekly.
Ladies, if you want to join me, Kegel exercises are super easy, but it is important to insure you are working the correct muscles. While going to the bathroom, stop the stream of urine mid-flow. That, is the muscle to contract– not your abs, and not your butt. (Don’t Kegel during urination on a regular basis or you may cause a bladder infection). Another way to ensure you contract the correct muscle is to lay on your back, slip a finger inside your vagina and do some Kegel reps. You should be able to feel your vagina contract around your finger, but you should also be able to feel your vagina relax around your finger.
Kegel exercises aren’t just about strengthening the muscles but about having conscious control over the muscles. The relax part of the rep is as important as the contract part. To enjoy the full range of experience during sex, then you need the full function of the muscles. If the muscles are weak then they can’t function and lose their sensitivity. If the muscles are in constant contraction then they don’t move freely and you again lose sensitivity. The relaxation of the muscle is as important as the contraction. One woman in class shared visualizing a string that pulls your Kegel’s up towards your tummy when you contract. And an opposite string that pulls toward your toes to relax. Again, periodically exercise with a finger in your vagina to check full contraction and full relaxation.
Are you ready to get serious about making Kegel exercises a part of your life? What is your plan?