Awaken-Love started 6 years ago when I taught my first class to 8 friends out on my back porch. I had no idea what I was doing. All I knew was that if I didn’t share what God was teaching me about sex, I wasn’t sure I could face Him. How could I call myself a Christian, a Christ follower, when I just ignored what He wanted me to do? So when God called, I followed, but that has not always been the case.
Afraid to Fail
I’ve done things I wasn’t proud of. Where I chickened out, and afterwards I hid and pretended like I didn’t know anything about it.
I remember one summer during college, my pastor asked me if I would lead a Sunday school class at my small church. Shyly I accepted, but feeling totally inadequate, unprepared, and ill-equipped I just skipped out. I didn’t even show up or ask for help. Afraid to fail, I didn’t even try!
Another time more recently, God called me to pray over a woman at church. I didn’t know her well, but I knew her well enough to know that she had criticized the sex classes I was teaching. At least 3 different times, God brought her to my attention and said, “Go pray for her”. The last time I told God, “ok, if she is alone, I will go talk to her.”The conditions had to be just right! I didn’t want to make a fool of myself!
I never prayed with her, because I chickened out, and God eventually stopped bugging me about it. I often wonder what would have happened if I had just been obedient. Maybe it wasn’t even about her. Maybe it was about me.
Windows of Opportunity
I don’t know if it is biblical, but it seems to be true for me. God opens up windows of opportunity for me to walk through. If I don’t act soon, the window closes. He prompts me, I know it and it scares me to death. When I drag my feet long enough, pretty soon He stops bugging me. The window will close.
When God prompts us, or makes our heart feel like it is going to pound right out of our chest, we are at a crossroads. A point where we can let go, and say, “OK, I am going to trust you.”
I am learning to embrace opportunities. From the simple prompts to share in a group, pray over someone, or pause and give someone a hug. To the bigger things like teaching sex classes, embracing speaking opportunities, or writing a book.
The other day I was listening to the worship song “Do It Again”, and all I could hear in my head was a sweet friend of mine singing. She is going through a really rough time with her family right now. Though I haven’t talked to her in months, I knew that God was prompting me to just send her a simple note that I care. Her reply when I obeyed said it all.
I don’t want to insinuate that I have it all together. I still run away from commitments because of fear. But I know that I always feel worse after running away then when I just try, even if all does not go as I planned.
If God is prompting you to work on your sex life, I pray that God would give you the courage to take a step. To listen to Him, trust Him and go for it.
If God is calling you to host an Awaken-Love class and share what you are learning about sex or minister to others, I pray that He would give you the courage to register and that He would make a way.
Take a peak at this video of a woman that never thought she would ever teach a sex class, but is so glad she did.